The Don't Hang Up Challenge

It's the secret to writing better copy

I’m not one of the world’s natural mentors.

The apprentices I trained as a comms manager thought I was a bit of a dick. That’s fine, I’ve got a reputation for having a bit of an attitude.

Not with clients like, just with other copywriters. Or so I’ve heard.

Anyway, because of my personality defects, I don’t do much in the way of helping others build their skills. I tend to just recommend books, if I’m asked.

But is that the right approach?

Sure, you can read loads of books - Write Copy, Make Money by Maslen, Ogilvy on Advertising are worth any newbie’s time. And you can refer to books as you’re working - Words That Sell, More Words That Sell and Sarah Townsend’s Little Book of Confusables are fixtures on my desk.

But you can’t read your way to getting good. You need to write.

A lot.

So I’ve come up with a recommendation of something people can write to get better at writing.

Not blogs. Because blogs aren’t structured enough to learn discipline.

And not emails. Because that’s learning how to make part of a funnel - two thirds of the work’s done elsewhere.

And definitely not 10,000 word long copy direct response pieces. Because they take weeks to write and you’ll be dead before you perfect your craft.

No, I reckon the best way to sharpen your copywriting muscles is learning the way I learned.

So from here on out, I’ll be recommending the Don’t Hang Up Challenge.

See, when I started out as a junior copywriter, my job was to write the free samples of on hold marketing that the agency’s travelling salesmen would use in their pitches.

Every day, I’d write five or six bespoke samples that’d then be recorded and produced.

It helped me get good. If you want to get good, try it yourself.

Here’s the rules.

Rule One: The whole piece must be self-contained, and able to be read in 30 seconds or less. Voiceover talent is expensive, and you can’t click a link in an audio script.

Rule Two: It has to get across at least one key piece of information about what the company sells to entice the listener to buy. The point of on-hold marketing is that it boosts retention and sales after all.

Rule Three: It has to keep the listener on the phone. They’re on hold. If you bore them, piss them off, or otherwise make them hang up, you’re done.

See? The Don’t Hang Up Challenge.

That’s all you’ve got to do. Write a script that will be heard by people who’ve rung a business and been left on hold, without breaking those rules.

Sounds simple. It’s not.

If you want to sharpen your skills, pick an industry at random, and come up with a compelling 30 second pitch that’s interesting enough to keep someone from hanging up and calling back.

If you’re lacking imagination, I genuinely did this for a skip hire company, a coat hanger manufacturer, Aston Villa FC and dozens of motorcycle dealerships. So start there.

Sit 30 feet from a busy telesales department, set yourself a 45 minute timer, stick Absolute Radio on, imagine a furious Irish woman glaring at you should you ever cough, and get to it.

Something mint - this page that’ll convince you to drop £500+ on a laptop bag

As part of our whole message first experts schtick, we’re looking at brands all over the world and writing about how they use a big idea, a key message in their marketing.

One of those brands is one Martin identified. Saddleback Leather.

They sell very expensive leather goods. We’re talking $100 just for a belt¹.

The key message behind everything is something simple like “enduring quality.” It’s running through that site like a stick of rock. But the way it’s expressed is pure class.

Just look at this strapline for starters.

So enduring, it’ll outlive you. And so high quality that your kids will be throwing haymakers by your coffin. 10/10, no notes.

But where this site really shines is on a page called “How To Justify Buying Quality.”

It’s like being in a damn judo hold.

Methodically breaking every single objection you could possibly have to dropping hundreds of dollars on a vanity purchase. You come out asking if you can actually afford not to buy a Saddleback product.

Look at this.

Price anchoring, all while putting the thought in your head that a leather briefcase is the same sort of precision engineered luxury product as a five thousand dollar watch.

That not doing it for you? How about some straight up maths?

That’s right, for just $5 per year, you’ll avoid scalding important contacts’ spouses with coffee and safeguard your career. You’d be a fool not to buy.

Take a look. I’m not sold on the Our Story page, but the rest of the site is gold.

1. $126 with international shipping. Of course I bought one. Do you not remember my “I fall for any good copy” confession?